Let The Wind Take Our Troubles Away

Oh the Poor Yahoos!

NYC Keepin' It Real, Yo

I didn't shout it from the rooftops, or Gawker Stalker it, but I did see Ms. "Um, Yeah I live in The Hills" Whitney Port the other night. She was sashaying up to a hotel room at the SoHo Grande (does she live there, or was she about to canoodle with her companion?). No, I was going to keep this B-list sighting close to the vest - at least until Heidi-less Season 4 of course. But now I hear that lovely is set to bring more reality to Gotham with her very own show. I'm more excited than when the rest of the Real Housewives got to stick it to Ramona in the season re-cap session.

And now, they've revealed that the skank-cast of Season 432 of Real World - Brooklyn Edition - will be living in "Fort Green". I'm ready for a W'burg hipster v. Real World ass clown shake down.

I Don't Give A Hoot About What You Think

Carl, What Makes You Tick?

I know... I've been getting a little too frou-frou pink on you all. Time for some nut-busting.

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Fine, I Admit It!

Fech... I've been in denial for 10 years, but it's now so abundantly clear after a Sunday afternoon in a place more estrogen-laden than the David's Bridal 50%-off sale. I'm friggin Miranda. And it's not a distressing thought just because she's everyone's least favorite, her fire engine red hair is nauseating, or that her teeth may be worse than Kirsten Dundst's...

Now comfortably in my fourth decade, I've become woefully honest with myself. (Or maybe I finally listened after years of the sibs telling me how abjectly priggish I am). Miranda is an uptight, know-it-all. She's quick to judge. Yeah, yeah, she's a good friend, and smart and talented and all, but still... gross, that reflection in the mirror is uh-ugh-ly. But admitting you have a problem is the first step.

At least the movie was highly entertaining. No, it won't change your life. But it won't make you hate it, either. Plus, there's a shit joke in there... something, even, for the boys.

No Gentlemen, Eating Luna Bars Will Not Make You More Bodacious

[Filed under Fun Fact Filled Fridays, Cross-referenced with inquiring Minds Want to Know]

From Chow, we've settled the age-old question: "Will Eating Luna Bars Make Guys' Breasts Grow?" Lessley Anderson dug up this helpful answer.

Clif Bar, manufacturer of the Luna nutrition bar—marketed “for women”—is asked this question all the time. The concern is baseless, however. Luna bars, which come in flavors including Lemon Zest, S’mores, and Dulce de Leche, contain no estrogen or other hormones that might cause men to grow mammary glands. They’re for women because they’re fortified with nutrients females typically need more of, or sometimes have a hard time getting in their diets. These include folic acid, calcium, iron, B vitamins, and fiber.

For example, women (and men) between the ages of 19 and 50 need 1,000 to 1,200 milligrams of calcium per day: the equivalent of three glasses of milk. Luna bars contain as much calcium as one glass of milk. But women tend to diet more than men, says Tara DelloIacono Thies, nutrition strategist for Clif Bar, and “calcium seems to go first, because they’re drinking less milk and eating fewer dairy products.” Folic acid is a form of vitamin B found in fruits and vegetables that’s also necessary to both sexes. But it’s particularly crucial for women trying to get pregnant, because a folic acid deficiency can cause birth defects. Men won’t suddenly find themselves expecting a child after consuming a Luna bar, either, just in case you’re wondering.

I guess this means it won't help A-cuppers become D-cuppers either anytime soon?